In Guatemala

Well it's almost the end of day 4 here, day 3 in Guatemala (the first day was spent traveling and in Mexico City). I have been doing a daily journal for you guys to read though, but have been unable to type it up here because of how long I am planning to make them. There is just so much I want to talk about, luckily I have brough my journal with me and make lists for each day. The first 2 days I get back (minimum of 2), I will lock myself in my room and all that I will do is edit photos and write a blog for each day of my trip.

We have a team blog which you may follow us to see what we do each day (my photos will not be included since the laptops here can't read RAW format and I'm not sinking so low as to shoot jpgs). Although I will be sharing many stories to you guys that would not be included on the blog, for a number of reasons (we've conducted a saying "what happens in Guatemala, stays in Guatemala")

The Blog is:
http://sites.google.com/site/bbcguatemala2010/project-updates

I have taken around 850 pictures on my normal guy, shot around 100 in film (which I am beyond excited about, you will have to wait to see why), and 300 on my really old digi (time lapses). I'm really glad I picked up that 32gb card, other wise I would of been swamped.  Have only 401 shots left on it, and have a maximum of around 1000 after I fill up this card (I have a 16gb and 8gb card left).

The children are so cute, and someone may have to beat me when we leave, seeing how I will try and bring one of them with me. It's just an incredible experience, and I have decided that I will dedicate much of my life towards these kind of amazing journeys. This one blows my other Mexico trip out of the water, no contest. One thing I do know, is this feeling, it is really what I am meant to do. This is my calling, this is what I am meant to do in my life, no doubt about it. I've always sorta felt that way, but it's just a feeling that you can't deny, you can't argue against it, this is the total truth. The is the way to my happiness in the grand scheme.

I'm online for like 10-30mins a day so if you see me online say hi, I would love to chat to some lovely people. Oh and by the way, there is no time difference between here and Calgary, many people think there is, but nope.

Well I'm going to get back to this 25+ degree weather (even when it rains!).

feeling

This is the feeling that made me lie to you
This is the feeling that made me cheat on you
This is the feeling that made me break up with you
This is the feeling that made me do the stupidest things I’ve ever done with you
This is the feeling that made me want to be more
This is the feeling that made me understand you less
This is the feeling that made me want to be by your side
This is the feeling that made me sleep with you
This is the feeling that made me want to punch you in the face
This is the feeling that made me want to be a better friend
This is the feeling that made me understand myself more
I tend to hate this feeling, but this feeling has made me learn much about myself

listening to: Boxer - The White Feathers
feeling: an ocean of emotion

I lay awake, my mind racing.
I can't fall asleep, for I can't get you out of my head.

I can't get many thing out of my head.
I am being overflown with thoughts,
Of the past, the present, and the future.
The doors have opened and the water is rushing in.


I am scared, unsure.
Maybe I'm not good enough,
That I can't bear your burden with you.
If I'm can't, I will hurt you, as I have hurt others,
I don't know if I can handle that again.

I look all around me, my walls are covered with pain.
As I look through my past, I see all the brokenness.
It's all coming back, my greatest fear turns out to be what I'm best at.

memory lane

listening to: Coconut Shells - Damien Rice
feeling: scattered 

i now recognize why and know how everything that happened, happened.

i should of looked upon the past a long time ago

it now all hangs on my wall as a reminder
of why i am where i am
of all the good that has happened
of all the people that let me down that road
of all the people that helped me out
of all the people i let down
of all the people that won't ever know it all
of all the people that actually know it all

but also so i don't let that shit happen again

So basically used all the 13x19 photo paper in my house, the glossy stuff that is. Did around 15+ prints today on 13x19, and did 17 5x7's. I ran out of glossy (ya finished off 3 boxes, not totally excited to tell my dad how much paper I used) with only 1 print left to do, so I went over to go pick something new out of our Fine Art paper. Yah that was a bad idea, I tried this Epson Vellum Fine Art Paper. Rich black's were no where in sight, now I remember why I don't use this stuff. All I can say is 'Yay for stock printer profiles and color calibrated monitors!' Didn't have to do an ounce of color correcting, if I did I would be here for another day, at least.

While setting up my last batch of 6 13x19 prints up, I finally got the error of empty ink. So I go lift up the lid and notice all 8 ink cartridges are shining red (1 really flashing (empty) and 1 slowly flashing (really low)), well that's great, low ink all around! Time to go replace this Unicorn's blood!

I have been using sticky tak (that blue sticky stuff) to stick my prints to the wall, and I have so far used 3 6"x1/2" strips of the stuff, there is just a bloody large number of prints I've been hanging. Still have 2 more strips and have around 40 more prints to get up. Just counted and I will have 105 prints on my wall by the end of the night. =)

I've been working on my room, in my room and basement (where our photo printer is), basically all day, for like the last 8 hours, and I'll still be at it for at least another 2 I'm guessing. Hopefully this mother will be done by a decent hour so I can get some gaming in still.

After all this work, I really want a 30" cutter, not a guillotine style paper cutter (they don't cut straight since they suck the paper in, even with a super sharp blade), but one of those ones with the wheel, circular blades. We have a small 11" one and I hate using the xacto knife and cutting mat to do it (cutting mat is only 15" too, not big enough!). It'll be on my wish list when I move out after I graduate and get into a studio. Oh yah, and a huge box of cotton gloves too, I hate touching my prints with my fingers and knowing I can't clean the finger prints off the lovely glossy surface.

Panoramic pictures will be up by the end of the day.